Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
