So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
