really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
