I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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