Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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