sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
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