you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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