Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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