Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. Thereβs a church congregation that knows all my business
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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