At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
