He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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