he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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