You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
