do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
