Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
