in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
Randomize
