she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I am mentally ready for anal.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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