is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
