Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
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