she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Be still, my beating vagina.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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