i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
