i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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