dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
