but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
