I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
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