I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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