do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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