Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
