I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Randomize
