Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
It's blow job season.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
