Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
