i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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