they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
