Having a random hookup so left but love u
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
