i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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