Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize