I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
please come you make the beer taste better
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
