i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
