maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize