it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Randomize
