I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
