I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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