oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
BRING THE BAGELS
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
