Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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