okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
