1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
