So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Randomize
