Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
