I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize