Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
