It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Randomize